Mama told me not to build castles in the air, but of bricks. She was the one who constantly pushed me forward and stirred me to strive to be the best that I can. In the countless times that things went south and continued to fall apart, there she was, a wonder woman standing by my side swift to shield every unwilling part of me from the falling debris. She was there in each tear that was about to trickle or a smile that was about to break into laughter. She was there where superman failed to show and when any other superhero fell short to save.
Unlike Papa whose character could be likened to a silent harp, Mama harps her subterranean emotions out. The day when she defended my older brother from a wrongdoing and said how much she loves both of us and shed a tear afterwards, I cried with her.
Mama is full of love and the abundance of that gift is what I see in her. When I gaze at my mom, I see strength only the strongest person could be blessed. When I gaze at my mom, I see tears that will unselfishly shed wherever, whenever, on my behalf. I am convinced that what a mother cannot do is to abandon her child in grief.
Mothers are awe-inspiring individuals. If God has to dispel all His blessings from heaven, I would ask Him to hand over the lion’s share to the mothers. That is one of the best ways to pay them for their sacrifices.
Take this example. Janice, a colleague, often turned sentimental in the small talks we have had about her son, Johann.
The sacrifices of Janice to making her first child enjoys a normal childhood, is both lightening and heartbreaking. That day when she accepted the truth and knew full well that her son hasn’t been growing the way she hopes for him to be, I felt the pain inside her. At the age of two, Johann would have passed the crawling stage and started walking, or somehow attempted to walk. He would have been responding to noise and the call of his name. He would have been the bright-eyed and bushy-tailed little boy in the house. But, sad to know, he is the complete opposite.
Janice agonizes in the silence of her heart. Her desires for Johann to grow big and run, is far from truth. She wants him to meet her with a smile when she gets home from work. She wishes him to say ‘Mama, I love you’. She yearns for him to feel how dearly she loves him. She wants to experience the delight of hearing his ‘first word’, longs for him to hug her when she says “Come Johann” and wants him to hear what she talks about. Because she talks of love, of patience, of so much love, so much patience!
Patience is what Janice needs and Johann needs it most. It might be a battle to fight to the finish, but every battle can be won. This is no basket case, as far as I know, many have survived and ended with big happy stories to tell. Janice’s comforts now lie on the dream that in the fullness of time her son will become someone great – someone she would be so proud of.
Yet, Johann doesn’t have to be someone for Janice to love. As long as Janice is there and Johann needs her, she would continue to explore avenues, talk about love and communicate with patience What Janice, a sacrificing mother cannot do, is to desert Johann in grief. God bless the mothers!
